Dear Nursery Teacher,
I hand over my piece of heart to you every morning and you seem too busy to acknowledge. I understand too many kids. If you are a mother I hope you know what it means to trust someone with one’s baby. If you are yet to become one, I hope you know how much your mother still worries for you even if she knows you are safe.
When I hand over my child to you, to my child’s nursery teacher, I do not expect my child to come home everyday and recite new rhymes. I do not expect my child to learn her ABCs first, I do not even expect her to count right all the time. You know what I expect, I expect her to come out smiling. I expect her to be happy about going to school every morning.
I do not expect her to tell me that she does not want to go to school because ‘Teacher Bahut Daantati Hai’. I don’t doubt you even a bit when you tell me that my three and a half year old talks a lot. I do not doubt you when you tell me that she is a little bit slow as compared to other kids when it comes to learning numbers. But I beg to differ when you say, ‘Bachche pyaar se sunte hi nahi hai’
When you tell me that my three and a half year old girl or her friends need threats like, ‘We will take you to the office; We will not let you go home; We will send you to daycare and your Mamma won’t come to pick you up’ I Do Not Trust You.
When I hand over my child to you who is this young all I expect of you is patience. These kids are so young. Do you know what happens when you thoughtlessly use these threats on my child, thinking that these are just simple tactics that every teacher uses to maintain discipline; thinking that this will not harm a child in any way?
Let me tell you what happens when you do it. My child comes out of school and she is not smiling, she does not even talk much to me, she gets angry coz may be that is what she is seeing you doing all the time. She hides her face in the blanket every morning hoping that I won’t be able to find her and so I would not send her to school. This is the same child who until now was always eager to go to school.
When I hand over my little toddler to you, I do not expect you to make her a perfect child, all I want is your honest dedication towards my child, towards all your students. I know your job is not easy, I know it is difficult to manage little ones but they belong to you, they are your students. Is the use of threats a permanent solution? Or is it just an escape route for you?I truly expect you to make sure that my child is not only safe when she is with you but also she feels safe around you. Doesn’t it sound strange that a nursery kid is scared of her teacher? There are two ways of disciplining a child, first one is threats, scolding and the likes and that is called negative discipline. The other one includes appreciation, trust and handling over more responsibility and showing the faith in the child. This one might take time to show results but this is more permanent and it is called positive discipline. This kind of discipline stays with the child forever.Your job is difficult and I genuinely appreciate you for choosing a profession as noble as teaching. But please understand that these little kids can do even better without threats. All they need a little more love and a lot of patience. I know people would say that it is easier said than done. I know it is difficult but it is not impossible.
Witha Lot of Faith
A Mother of a Nursery Student
**This letter is not based on one person’s experience but a general overview of the things discussed, shared by parents whose kids go to different schools.